Wednesday, December 26, 2012

TRYING HARDER CAN MAKE THINGS WORSE

Trying Harder Can Make Things Worse

I grew up attending a large denominational church and many others in our fellowship maintained long and serious commitments to church and family. On the other hand, a number of us came from no particular religious faith; some even considered themselves agnostic or atheist when they first came to our fellowship.

            Regardless of the religious position I claimed, my secrets, my addictions and my compulsions increased anyway. Destruction began to overtake my mind, my life and all that I was as a human being. More and more I became obsessed with the sexual conquest of women, focusing less and less on the important things in my life. I was increasingly obsessive about sex while working harder and harder to overcome the out-of-control way I felt about my life. Addiction was taking my mind away from me. Mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, I was being choked lifeless while I claimed to be in control. Repeatedly I made commitments to stop. But, I was losing touch with reality as I professed commitments and recommitments to God, to religious practice, to my family and to myself. I tried and failed again and again and again. No matter how much I tried, my best efforts always ended in failure. No amount of self-determination, effort or religious activity protected me from my addicted compulsions. No matter how hard I tried, I found no effective plan, method or power to permanently overcome my obsessions, or the shame that always followed them. The harder I tried, the worse things got.
 
from When Lost Men Come Home - not for men only
copyright 2012, David Zailer

Operation Integrity 2012 Year End Update


 Operation Integrity 2012 Year End Update

With joy and thanksgiving, I give you the Operation Integrity year-end update. 2012 brought significant growth to our work helping people recover from addiction, leading to radical life transformation — all made possible by your prayers and financial support.



 

· Operation Integrity fellowships are helping men, women and families, escape destructive behaviors and isolation moving toward honest and transparent relationships — Coast Hills Church, Lifelines at The Crossing Church, Capistrano Beach Church and Center City Church host OI groups

· We are mentoring private recovery meetings across the country, our literature bringing understanding where there had been confusion and anger

· Our books, Our Journey Home and When Lost Men Come Home, not for men only are making a difference

· We are providing affordable recovery programs through our 45 Day Intensive & 90 Day Transformation programs; and collaborating with counselors, therapists, churches, and substance abuse treatment centers

· I have been speaking locally and around the U.S. — leading Operation Integrity gatherings and conferences in Charleston West Virginia and Springfield Missouri, with more scheduled for this year and 2013

· Operation Integrity was in Leadership Magazine, Envision Magazine, Christianity Today, Covenant Eyes, Power for Living, and the Healing for The Soul Herald

· We are helping Pastors and Clergy in Ohio, West Virginia, North Carolina, Oklahoma, California, Michigan, Texas and Canada

· Operation Integrity became a founding member in Katharos, sharing resources and experience with similar ministries

· Operation Integrity Weeklygoes out to more than 3500 people each week

Real Life Results
This afternoon I meet with a 30-something year-old husband and father. He is a wonderful young man but struggled with addiction to pornography since adolescence — keeping his struggle secret — he was hijacked alone inside out and out. Operation Integrity was the turning point, giving him the help he needed, bringing him education, community, counseling and mentoring, and family support. Today he is porn free, his relationship with his wife is healing, and he is living in Christ empowered freedom, and seeing this freedom spread throughout his life. He is just one example of how Operation Integrity is changing lives.

Leaning into the work God is laying out for Operation Integrity, I ask that you financially support Operation Integrity. (Your financial support to Operation Integrity is tax deductible.) I thank you personally for your financial contributions, but most of all I thank you for your ongoing support through prayer.

There are two convenient ways you can financially support Operation Integrity.

1. Visit us at www.operationintegrity.orgto make a donation.

2. Mail your check to Operation Integrity, 24040 Camino del Avion #A115, Monarch Beach CA
92629.

Yours in Christ and recovery,

David Zailer
Executive Director
Operation Integrity - Helping people recover from addiction, leading to radical life transformation.

1-800-762-0430
Follow Operation Integrity on Facebook, & Twitter @opintegrity

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Recovery is Both Hard and Simple

Recovery is Both Hard and Simple

Addiction recovery is not fashionable, popular or exclusive. It is hard work and often marked by mishaps and mistakes. (At least that is how it has been for me.) The work of recovery is simple though. All that is required is an authentic desire to change, the courage to be honest and the willingness to do the work. And through personal experience, I’ve become convinced that the primary ingredient needed for recovery from sexual addiction is honest spiritual growth. Every area of a one’s life must become re-oriented spiritually if life is going to be healthy and good for them. 

            As we seek God sincerely, and live transparently with others, we will be better able to face ourselves honestly and know The Source of power that leads us out of the darkness that ruled our lives in the past. When we are willing to face the honest facts about ourselves and take steps necessary to change, we discover an effective spiritual and personal life. We find a solution building and strengthening inside us. And with this strength we can become contributing partners with those around us. With the spiritual put in order, life’s external struggles begin to resolve themselves with amazing simplicity.

from When Lost Men Come Home - not for men only
copyright 2012, David Zailer
 

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Strength In Numbers


 strength in numbers

Each of us who participates in Operation Integrity has our own personal experience and story, but we celebrate together as one fellowship, a community of survivors who have an intuitive understanding of one another’s experiences. And while our stories and experiences are all different, having unique patterns, behaviors and consequences, we see ourselves reflected in one another. This has taught us to focus on the similarities we share and not the differences. In this way we benefit individually from the total strength the fellowship offers as a whole. To the extent that we participate personally in our recovering community, we benefit from its resources. But it is more than this. Along with the benefits, we share the sufferings and shortcomings of one another at the same time. Anyone who wants to recover from sexual addiction is welcomed and accepted.

from When Lost Men Come Home - not for men only
copyright 2012, David Zailer

 

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Empowered in Powerlessness - When Lost Men Come Home; not for men only


Empowered in Powerlessness

Every day I realize how powerless I am — in my own power that is — to find the freedom that my soul longs for. Having said that, I do have days when I feel tremendous freedom, abandoning my old self-destructive ways and enjoying life’s goodness to the fullest. There are other days, though, when I feel that at any moment I may catapult myself into a darkness that far exceeds my own ability to escape. Sometimes, sexual addiction assaults me with a conflict of mind, spirit and body, brutalizing me at the very core of who I am. Can you relate to this?

            Those of us who have struggled with repeated patterns of sexually destructive behavior and who are honest with ourselves know this powerlessness, though we often have trouble admitting it. Recognizing and admitting personal powerlessness and insufficiency regarding an addiction is a fundamental principle that must be accepted deeply before anyone will find recovery and change for themselves and their life. Just like being an alcoholic, the solution starts with admitting we have a problem. Personally, I almost died in depression and shame before I accepted this simple truth. And I know of others who, even after countless failures, continue to claim confidence in themselves alone. It seems to me like they die a little more every day.

            Without the benefit of honestly recognizing and admitting my addictions, my self-confidence was a liability to me. However, when I got honest about the true condition of my life, I could no longer avoid the reality of my sexual addiction. I could see that I was trapped in a progressing and accelerating downward spiral. My failures were personal and profound, born from the deepest places within me. My life was getting worse, never better.
 
from When Lost Men Come Home - not for men only
copyright 2012, David Zailer

Monday, December 3, 2012

Wonderul Experience in Colorado & Presenting 2012 Year End Update

Hello Operation Integrity Supporter,

I have just returned from a wonderful trip to Colorado Springs Colorado, where I spoke at the monthly breakfast for Christian Counselors from the Colorado Springs area, and conducted a day of training for counselors associated with Healing for the Soul. Both events went wonderfully, and there is already talk of me returning to The Springs in a few months.

As I work to wrap up 2012, I want to take a few moments to thank you for your prayers and financial support this year and ask that you continue praying for me and for Operation Integrity, and that you would also remember us in your end of the year giving.

Our Year End Update is below. Please take a few minutes to review it.

Yours truly in Christ and recovery,

David Zailer

Operation Integrity 2012 Year End Update
With joy and thanksgiving, I give you the Operation Integrity year-end update. 2012 brought significant growth to our work helping people recover from addiction, leading to radical life transformation — all made possible by your prayers and financial support.
· Operation Integrity fellowships are helping men, women and families, escape destructive behaviors and isolation moving toward honest and transparent relationships — Coast Hills Church, Lifelines at The Crossing Church, Capistrano Beach Church and Center City Church host OI groups
· We are mentoring private recovery meetings across the country, our literature bringing understanding where there had been confusion and anger
· Our books, Our Journey Home and When Lost Men Come Home, not for men only are making a difference
· We are providing affordable recovery programs through our 45 Day Intensive & 90 Day Transformation programs; and collaborating with counselors, therapists, churches, and substance abuse treatment centers
· I have been speaking locally and around the U.S. — leading Operation Integrity gatherings and conferences in Charleston West Virginia and Springfield Missouri, with more scheduled for this year and 2013
· Operation Integrity was in Leadership Magazine, Envision Magazine, Christianity Today, Covenant Eyes, Power for Living, and the Healing for The Soul Herald
· We are helping Pastors and Clergy in Ohio, West Virginia, North Carolina, Oklahoma, California, Michigan, Texas and Canada
· Operation Integrity became a founding member in Katharos, sharing resources and experience with similar ministries
· Operation Integrity Weekly goes out to more than 3500 people each week
Real Life Results
This afternoon I meet with a 30-something year-old husband and father. He is a wonderful young man but struggled with addiction to pornography since adolescence — keeping his struggle secret — he was hijacked alone inside out and out. Operation Integrity was the turning point, giving him the help he needed, bringing him education, community, counseling and mentoring, and family support. Today he is porn free, his relationship with his wife is healing, and he is living in Christ empowered freedom, and seeing this freedom spread throughout his life. He is just one example of how Operation Integrity is changing lives.
Leaning into the work God is laying out for Operation Integrity, I ask that you financially support Operation Integrity. (Your financial support to Operation Integrity is tax deductible.) I thank you personally for your financial contributions, but most of all I thank you for your ongoing support through prayer.
There are two convenient ways you can financially support Operation Integrity.
1. Visit us at www.operationintegrity.org to make a donation.
2. Mail your check to Operation Integrity, 24040 Camino del Avion #A115, Monarch Beach CA
92629.
Yours in Christ and recovery,
David Zailer
Executive Director
Operation Integrity - Helping people recover from addiction, leading to radical life transformation.
1-800-762-0430
Follow Operation Integrity on Facebook, & Twitter @opintegrity